I don’t see


 

You aren’t allowed to go out of the house at night, my mom yelled.

Yes, the time is not good for girls, I added.

My sister defended as much as she could with her logic,

We denied, I denied

We denied because our experiences said it, 

We denied because we have seen more life than her,

We denied because crime rates were skyrocketing in the news,

We denied because we have to protect her and our family’s prestige

She cried, a lot.

She felt caged, she felt sorry for being a girl.

But we ignored, we ignored because those devils existed,

 we ignored because a strength of a girl was made her weakness,

we ignored because justice won't be served,

 we ignored because all our life we lived either ignoring or being ignored.

We were being ignored when we wanted to study just like our brother,

We were being ignored when we objected any family’s major decisions about our life,

We were being ignored when our ‘’no’’ meant ‘’yes’’ to men

We were being ignored when we … ( long gasp)

We ignored bullying, we ignored catcalling,

We ignored intended rubbing of their body,

 We ignored our life, our dreams, our voice.

Dear sister, I can relate with what you are feeling now,

But that’s our only option.

I was as rebellious as you are when I was of your age

My voice, my awareness, my education bent its head in front of these

 rapists, acid attackers and sexual harassers, 

because there are too many of them.

Roaming around openly, inside the house, 

on the road, in the bus, in the office, in the crowd and even in the isolated building

I am so sorry, I still can’t allow you to go out after the dusk,

To pour their thirst for the human body.

I don’t see man, I see image of slowly turning his body over mine,

I saw him doing some uncomfortable activities,

I saw him hugging when I was sleeping in the bus,

I saw him taking advantage of the public vehicle.

I saw him discussing about my sleeveless cloth with other men,

I saw him raping me when I was fully covered with dress,

I saw him following me when I was returning from school,

I saw him writing disgusting things about me on social media and what not.

Not only in the night, I saw him in the daylight.

All the faces of the girls are either victims or survivors,

 being only the point of commonality between them.

Again self defense class, again lectures to wear decent dresses, again restrictions till when? Don’t know.

May be when the toxic mentality changes, 

But when is the day, don’t ask.

Young girls are being raped even before knowing what is the meaning of ‘rape’

I don’t see women either, I see a look going faster than men on cleavages and butts,

I see the gossips about no makeup, face and body shaming.

I see the ego to be better than any girls around,

I see the comments about a personal life that a girl used to provoke a man.

I see me, my mothers and my sisters in these women.

I  see my brother, my father and my friends in these men.

All the slang are said just like that to women,

All the superior words are only awarded to men.

If a daughter or a girl does anything good then there comes comment, 

‘’WOW, how masculine’’, Oh! You are actually the son of the family.

I  am not safe here sister, neither I was inside my mother’s womb

You are not safe here nor inside the mind of any men or women’s around

Rape first occurs in mind and then executed physically.

Our impression is always of a weak, vulnerable person

 who just need protection from men, elders 

We are just another girl in everyone else's mind,

History is evidence not only a woman’s body but 

a woman’s identity was always always rape, is always raped, always.